1 ✻ I.... don't want a lot for Christmas [Action/Text]

[weaponry]

[ A - Action. Morning. Tenten, Ino and Riku's apartment. ]

[ And, so it's Christmas. After a valiant struggle with elves, their ridiculous requests and their oddly judgmental and hypocritical methods, Tenten is left with a single gift. She wasn't sure if she was naughty or nice, because she kinda broke even with them or compromised, but, she did get a gift. She hastily unwrapped it, hoping it'd be a brand new swiss army weapon.

She did not get the swiss army weapon. Her mouth drops the floor quicker than a bunch of kids after an ice cream truck. She shrieks. In her hands is one, giant portrait of Guy-sensei, in really tight green spandex. He mimics a famous pose, and there's a similar message adorned on the picture. However, it states "I WANT YOU.....TO BE MORE YOUTHFUL". She stares at it in horror. Had she not been nice enough? Did her previous aids of babysitting children during the draft go unnoticed? All of these questions where swirling around her head as she took a breath out and accepted her fate as naughty. ]

[ B - Action. Morning. Community housing one, floor four's hallway ]

[ Well, residents (or passer-bys) of complex 1, four floor apartment can see the picture of Uncle Sam Guy-sensei in skin strangling green spandex with the command that "I WANT YOU.....TO BE MORE YOUTHFUL" hung on the end of the hall, right above the entrance to the kitchen. His eyes seem to follow around the looker, making for quite an unsettling portrait. Yeah. Tenten can be seen staring at it from her door, her mouth still agape in horror. ]

[ C - Action. Morning - Later Afternoon. Library. ]

[ Maybe there was a mistake in the system. There had to be a mistake, right? Tenten, dawned in her Christmas Outfit, which is actually the only article of clothing she has available, per the elf's ridiculous request, marches her way to the library. You're free to encounter her on the way there, but it looks like she's on a mission as she madly mutters about tight green spandex and youthfulness.

You can catch Tenten at the library reading an army of books about Santa. She seems to have multiple notes on a nearby piece of paper. Some of which read the obviously helpful, "WEARS RED SUIT", "HEAVY SET AND JOLLY", "HAS DISEASED REINDEER?", "HAS CONNECTIONS TO COAL", and, "ELVES? CREEPY, AND SIMILAR LOOKING BY GENETICS?" and other types of brief, unintentionally hilarious, notes. A couple of times, she gazes to her notes and talks about how something just doesn't make sense, but, for the most part, she's pretty enveloped in her studies about the jolly old man. ]

[ D - Text. Evening. ]

Question, how can Santa make it down a chimney if he obviously can't fit down there, given numerous depictions? How about homes that don't have chimneys? Do the elves take into a general account of your behavior, or just your behavior during Christmas time?

[ Someone is taking this way too seriously. ]

Comments

C!

[niceguypose]

[So Rock Lee had slept in all night after spending all night trying to be Santa. His own gift for Tenten, which he would have at least tried to leave in her room the night before, was a locket with a picture of Team Gai packed with a battle axe. Because she loves weapons, right?

Either way, once Lee wakes up he beholds that Gai poster in amazement. And he proceeds to dash over to the library with the amazing poster in hand, crying tears of youth as he combs the area for Tenten. Oh, and on his shoulder is a squirrel friend, brought to him by Santa from the Forest of Death.]

TENTENNNN! WHERE ARE YOU?!

[weaponry]

[ Tenten can be seen with a makeshift figure of Santa stuck in a fake, small chimney. She keeps trying to push him into the chimney. Her battle axe is, rest assured, over the fireplace mantel with the picture of Team Guy below it.

Tenten was trying her best to concentrate on her studies, and Lee's interruption will not be tolerated! This is a library! He has to be quiet! Which is why she'll yell at a volume that's at least twice as loud as Lee's initial greeting. ]

Lee! I'm over here! Be quiet, this is a liiiiiiiibrrrrrrarrrrrrrrrrry!!! [ A very loving Christmas in 3.... 2.... 1... ]

[niceguypose]

I am so sorry, Tenten! [He shouts back as he homes in one her location.] I did not mean to betray the dignity of this area! I have merely wished to wish you a most merry Christmas! And... [As he approaches, he holds up the poster accusingly.] I must know what deeds you have performed to earn this masterpiece!

[It's a loving little family, alright.]

[weaponry]

... [ She isn't sure what to say. She'll drop the library offense for now, because she can just tie it in with how to respond to this question without hurting someone's feelings. ]

I can't say I'm quite sure what I did to deserve this, Lee. I mean, I never really outright gave in to the elves' demands, instead I just compromised on them with some things. I've been researching this at the library, to determine if I've been naughty or nice, and why guarding a bunch of children from weird cultists on the moon doesn't qualify as nice if I'm naughty. [ oh boy lee you are opening up a submarine of asspain. ]

B

[screw_fate]

[Neji freezes in horror at the poster as he emerges from his apartment.]

... What the hell.

[weaponry]

I don't have any words, Neji.... [ She stares off, clearly traumatized by this horrific sight. ] They've crossed the point of forgiveness. The Malnosso and Santa. [ Hate hate hate hate hate hate hate.... Yeah, Neji, your teammate is rendered speechless for once. She must be comforted through this tough time. ]

[screw_fate]

Truly they have.

[He moves over to her side.]

Clearly we will need to be suitably revenged for this. And for how much Lee is going to carry on about it.

[weaponry]

[ this entire thread is like an opening to a taratino film. ]

I thought about lighting it on fire, but I don't think I could live with the guilt, from either Guy-sensei or Lee. [ ....This is just heartbreaking. ] What did I do to deserve this?!

D - Voice

[endgames]

[Writing is too troublesome, so. 8|]

Some kind of jutsu? If he's real.

[Somewhere offscreen, the elf in his room shouts in indignation, "Of course he is!"]

[weaponry]

I think he's real. I mean, I'm sure there'd have to be some sign of his existence or else he wouldn't have such a notable reputation! [ ....She's been studying this, okok. She sighs at the elf. ]

So they're still with you, huh?

[endgames]

Just the one.

[And he'd argue, if not for that one. In some reality, a Santa might exist, so he supposes that one came to this world between this Christmas and last.]

[weaponry]

Hmm.. I haven't seen mine all day today. I suppose it might be following Ino, or it found someone new to harass. [ Or maybe it got caught in one of Tenten's apartment booby traps to prevent theft and/or tomfoolery. If this was the case though, she'd try her best not to acknowledge it. ]

The supposed ultimate evidence of his existence has me conflicted, and kind of doubtful, to say the least. His "gift" seems like something that the Malnosso would produce.

D - written

[redhairedknight]

For the first two questions, I figure it's magic - there's plenty of spells that can allow him to do what he does. As for the third, it's probably for the whole year; there wouldn't be much of a point in saying whether someone's been good or bad if they get rewarded for only acting good in the last moments.

[weaponry]

I suppose you're right but wouldn't people be able to notice or detect the magic? Unless he's a legendary spell caster...

I thought so too, but, I think my gift makes me naughty but I think I was pretty nice where it counted. Unless it's a gift to demonstrate neutrality. Is that a category?

[redhairedknight]

It's possible... There's no other choice - I'll have to stay up all night next year and ask him when he shows up! [...]

I don't think so. Still, if you got something aside from coal, you must have been nice - at least, that's what it's like back home.

((OoC: Sorry - I haven't been able to tag for a while, between the holidays and writing assignments. Hope this is okay!))

[weaponry]

I'll join you in the Santawatch too! I need to give this man a peace of my mind and I don't think his elves will be showing up next year! [ She's very defiant about this. ]

Hmmm... we didn't have Santa back home, but, my research indicates that coal is really, really common.

[ ooc: i backtag to infinity and beyond, so don't worry about it! ]

D; written

[etudes]

Maybe he holds his breath so he can fit through there. [ It's okay, Tenten isn't the only one who takes this seriously. ]

[weaponry]

That's a decent theory, but even doing the calculations, he'd have to be skinner than the definition of "chubby" to properly pull off such a feat. [ ...They'll join each other in questioning this Santa figure... ] Some other person suggested he has the ability to turn himself into vapors, which makes sense and can explain why he enters through a chimney.

[etudes]

I don't know if Santa has magical powers though. At least, not the kind of magical powers that can make him get into a chimney.. [ .. hmm.. ]

Maybe he can just drop the presents down just right so they land where they're supposed to?

D [Written]

[ilyana]

As I understand it, Santa Claus has an array of magical abilities that allow him to do these various tasks. For example, in order to make it down Chimneys from what I have witnessed, Santa Claus is capable of turning into a gaseous form with his bag of presents. I would have to assume when confronted with a similar problem, like that of a household without a chimney, he'd be capable of coming in underneath a door. Perhaps he'd even be able to use ventilation pipes of some sort as well.

As to the behavior of those that Santa deems naughty or nice? I believe it must be a bit of a combination of the two. Christmas time is likely when he pays the most attention, and your deeds count nearly twice as much then, but he most likely takes into account your behavior throughout most of the year as well. I would believe there is also the possibility of Santa being more forgiving of certain naughty behavior, if one is genuinely striving to turn over a new leaf.

These are the observations I have made from reading texts involving him, and observing the man in action for myself.

[Ilyana was certainly more capable of not stuttering, taking long pauses, or sounding frail when writing. Although she still has yet to realize that the Santa she saw was actually Smoker, the marine.]

oh praise jesus || written

[weaponry]

Wait, you actually saw Santa Claus? What did he look like?! Did he make any comments about being naughty or nice? How did he turn into gas? Was it a gradual change? A sudden change? A partial change?

I think the second part is right too. He looks onto see any last minute adjustments in behavior, or final evidence that a person is naughty or nice. I wonder why he chose to send the elves this year, since they weren't here last year.

Thank you for the information, by the way! It's really helpful in solving my dilemma.

PFFFT XDDD || written

[ilyana]

[Ilyana has to take several long pauses in between writing down answers in her elegant handwriting, a little overwhelmed, but still wanting to seem professional.]

Those are indeed some very difficult questions to answer. He was a very tall man, who liked to smoke, wore a red hat and coat, and carried a large bag of presents. I don't seem to recall him making any comments about being naughty or nice, but I may be forgetting things that happened in the heat of the moment. I was rather pleased to meet this character I had been told so much about from one of my friends.

[Ironically a friend you know quite well Tenten.]

As to the turning into gas? I didn't get quite as good a look as might have liked. I believe I remember him saying now that he didn't want me to see it, so perhaps that does pertain slightly to a naughty act. I would also like to elaborate by saying, he didn't change into gas, but a gaseous state. If I were to describe it, I believe I would describe it looking a bit more like smoke than anything else. This might make sense, if his primary method of entering households or establishments is indeed through chimneys.

I am glad that I've been able to shed some light on your troubles.

(ooc: Also sorry, I forgot to track the thread, and thus didn't get a notif >_>)

A

[stilldontgotit]

[So, Riku just got up, and he was about to slip outside for his daily routine, but Tenten's expression alone catches his eye, and after a moment, he approaches, raising an eyebrow at the poster.]

What's all this about?

[weaponry]

[ Just going to turn the poster to Riku. Yeah. Stare at it. Regret your life choices and feel kinda uncomfortable with the tight spandex, the borderline angry face and the demand to get younger. ]

It's a Christmas present. I'm not sure what did I do to deserve this, or if this makes me naughty or nice, but I'm pretty sure Santa, and his elves, have the worst taste in making gifts.

[stilldontgotit]

[...Yeah, that's. Definitely going to stay in the back of his mind for some time.]

Well, if it's any consolation, I don't think you have to worry about looking more youthful.